Betsy

She didn’t make any sound the entire car ride home. I was worried and kept checking on her.

“I’m sure she’s fine,” said Kurt. “Probably just a little nervous.”

I placed my hand on her again and she moved, I sighed. I was exhausted. I had spent the entire day getting ready for her arrival. Went to three different stores and made five trips to the car, all while covering Apple’s annual WWDC.

The car went over a bump and she made a small squeak and readjusted in her cage.

“What if she hates us?” I asked.

“She won’t. She’s going to be happy,” Kurt assured.

I went through the list again in my head. Food and water bowls, check. Bed, check. Food, check. Treats, check. Litter box, check. Planet-friendly litter that dad suggested, check.

“Do you think we have everything? Do you think she wants something we don’t have?” I asked.

“We’ll get her in the apartment and then see,” Kurt said. He was being kind putting up with my questions. My morning hadn’t been easy and he had the texts to prove it.

I’d wanted a cat since I moved to college five years ago. Nothing fixes a bad day like a purring cat. But apartments in Eugene and Portland weren’t as into animals as I was. Finally, after moving 669 miles away from the familiar, I found a landlord who obliged this obsession.

Upon moving to California, I was ready for a change. After two years of job searching, I realized the Portland area wasn’t right for me career-wise. That said, I was nervous. Sure, I had moved to different states before, and I didn’t know anyone those times either. But this time, I was working from home and not going to school.

That cut down my chance for social interaction significantly, and I desperately wanted a furry roommate to talk to all day, or at least look at.

Enter Betsy.

She actually chose Kurt. I am an unconditional lover of cats and was willing to adopt any of them. Even Cornelius, who eternally had snot dripping out his nose and clouded eyes that made it hard to make his way around his cage.

Kurt had never owned cats and wasn’t around them that much growing up, so I was curious to see who he would gravitate to. Cornelius didn’t make the cut, especially after hearing the potential medical bills that would come with him.

We went to the communal room where they put the cats that like other cats and don’t need a private space. I was chasing a gorgeous calico who wanted nothing to do with me when Kurt called to me from across the room.

He was sitting cross-legged on the floor as a tiny black and white cat danced around him, rubbing against his legs. I sat down next to him and we pet her awhile longer.

She was primarily white with grey splotches on her back and ear. My favorite feature was her long fluffy grey tail that looked much too large for her tiny frame.

Overwhelmed by choices in the humane society, I told Kurt we should continue to look through the many rooms. As he stood up to go, the cat, Betsy, reached up to him and lodged one claw in his jeans.

“Oh I don’t think she wants you to leave,” a volunteer said.

At that moment, Kurt and I were in love. The volunteer told us she was 11 years old, which is perfect. We wanted an older cat, because they are less likely to get adopted, and already know how to use the litter box, and feed themselves.

Though I would have adopted her then and there, Kurt reminded me we were going way for the weekend and should wait until next week. Waiting is something I’ve never been great at. I checked the website every day to make sure her photo was still there. Sunday I called and put a hold on her.

Monday morning I woke up early, hit PetSmart and Safeway and bought everything an elderly cat would need. The volunteer told me to call before going in to make sure she was still on hold.

At 9 am sharp, I called the adoptions line and got a busy signal. I just figured someone else was calling in and began watching the Apple WWDC and taking notes. Through all the iPhone and iPad demonstrations, and Tim Cook speeches, all I could think about was Betsy.

I called every half an hour and left two messages, but still got no response. I was starting to lose whatever cool I had.

“Someone already adopted her,” I thought. “Of course they did, she’s perfect, and I don’t know how to make a stupid phone call. Shut up, Tim.”

Finally at 12:15 I got a callback. Apparently the adoptions center doesn’t open until noon, and that information is very clearly on the website, according to the volunteer. I ignored the annoyance in her voice and said I would be there at 5:30 to adopt my new friend.

I picked Kurt up from work and we drove straight to the humane society. I signed some papers, and she was ours.

A volunteer put her in the carrier, and I gingerly carried her out the car. I sat in the back seat with her in case she needed anything, but she was silent the entire time.

Coming from a childhood of cats that howled the entire car ride, this made me very nervous. I spent the car ride sticking my hands between the bars and making clucking sounds.

Finally, we arrived and let her loose in the apartment. She explored a bit but wouldn’t go past the kitchen, afraid of the street noise in the front room.

I wouldn’t feel comfortable until she had eaten, drank, and used the litter box. The first two were checked off the list quickly. Betsy walked straight toward her bowls and laid down on the tile floor, purring.

The next morning, she still hadn’t used the litter box, and I began to worry. My cats growing up were notorious for peeing in strange places so I began walking around the house smelling. Everything was clear, so she was just holding it.

“Maybe she doesn’t like that kind of litter,” Kurt said.

He was right, she wanted plain old sand, not the wood chipped litter that is safer to throw away. That wasn’t for our girl.

At 8 am, I went to Safeway and picked up unscented Tidy Cats.

“It’s early to be picking up cat litter,” the cashier said.

“I know. I got a new cat and she apparently doesn’t like the one I chose,” I responded.

“It must be nice to be a cat, make humans run around just to clean up your poop,” he said.

Within the next few days, it felt like she had always lived with us. She slept on the bed, rolled in the sunshine and purred.

She purred as soon as anyone looked at her or made a noise. A friend stopped by the apartment, she purred. Kurt said something to me about dinner, she purred. I bumped her in the middle of the night, she purred. That was the soundtrack to the next four months with Betsy.

Go Boldly: The Legacy of Leonard Nimoy

The world received sad news this week when Leonard Nimoy passed away. For those that don’t know, Nimoy was best known as his role as Spock in the original Star Trek. His death doesn’t just leave a mark on the nerd community but for anyone who has felt out of place. Nimoy has always been a crusader for the different.

In 1966 he appeared as the unfeeling vulcan Spock aboard the starship Enterprise. Vulcans are taught not to experience or give into emotion, but because Spock is half human he spends a lot of his time fighting the feelings he doesn’t understand. In a world where humans live and work with aliens from all over the universe, Spock is the most unusual on the ship. Though Captain Kirk will never understand his behavior, let’s be honest he doesn’t really try, he still considers Spock a best friend.

From the day it started Star Trek showed a more diverse world than we could ever imagine. The bridge of the Enterprise was comprised of a prominent black woman (if you don’t know anything about Nichelle Nichols, open a new tab and read about her immediately. She’s amazing.), an alien that can only work logically, and of course the incomparable George Takei (if you don’t know who that is, you haven’t been on the Internet in five years and I can’t help you). In their journeys, they came upon races and people never seen before and interacted with them without second thought.

In the future, Earth works as one to grow our understanding of the universe, and Spock was at the center of that. He showed that friendship doesn’t mean coming from the same background, but that the only way to grow as a person or uh Vulcan is to surround yourself with people that challenge you. Kirk and Spock are as different as you can get, and yet their friendship spawned generations of fans or Trekkies or Trekkers, depending.

Nimoy said that from playing Spock for so long he began to act like him in her personal life. He turned to logic before emotion and approached situations in a more calm manner. In 1973, the Star Trek animated series was created. Nimoy heard the creators were planning on leaving out Nichols and Takei, and said he wouldn’t do it without them. He said they are the ones that most represent diversity and losing them meant losing him.

In 1968, Nimoy received a letter from a girl who had a black mother and white father. She wrote about feeling like she didn’t belong so she reached out to the one person she thought would understand, someone half human/half vulcan. His response detailed Spock’s difficult childhood, never feeling accepted but how he has found his place. I suggest reading the entire letter, no one can say it better than him.

This week we mourn the loss of an icon, but it is the perfect time to remember all that he has taught us through his words and work. It seems kind of silly that this day and age we put stock in tweets, but his last was perfect.

As always, live long and prosper.

Don’t be ashamed to take time for yourself

Life is stressful. Whether it’s work, lack of work, friends, family, or being in line at the DMV, stress is an inescapable part of daily life. There are some days when things are harder to deal with. Sometimes you are faced with a normal day but the things that have been on your mind weigh more heavily than usual. When you get to this place it can be hard to be productive.

Today I had a stressful day at work, and when I got home and started applying to jobs like I do every evening, I found it hard to focus. Instead of rewriting my cover letter I found myself thinking about my day and the fact that I haven’t had any job prospects in about a week. That’s when I put my computer down and turned off my phone.

When I get to that place I need to unplug and take some time for myself. In college I used to feel guilty about taking an hour or two to watch TV, read a magazine or sit under a tree somewhere. This is time I could be using to be productive and counteract the stress I’m feeling. I finally realized forcing yourself to work when you’re not focused leads to mistakes and inevitably more stress. If taking time off leads to productivity later, it’s worth it.

I realize you can’t take time off work during the day if you’re starting to feel overwhelmed, but taking a walk at lunch or even around the office can help reduce the worry until you can get home and do whatever relaxes you. For me, it’s a TV show or movie and a delicious dinner. I also like to turn my phone off for awhile to really focus on myself.

This isn’t something I need to do every day or even every week but everyone needs a reset, even if it’s a small one.

Writing is a muscle

The ability to write is like a muscle. You can read books about writing and take lessons, but the only way to strengthen it is to use it. Watching work out videos will give you ideas and tips for your next gym experience, but it won’t do the work for you. The same goes for writing, sometimes the only way to get better is just to do it.

That’s one of the reasons I started this blog. I write at work, but I wanted to try a new style of writing. So far, I’ve loved it. It’s a great stress release and it’s fun. Now I’m inspired to try other kinds of writing. In college I took a creative non-fiction class, and although I didn’t care for the professor, I loved the style of writing. I also love comedy but never tried to write comedy. Whether thats stand-up or sketch

This year I’m going to take time during the weekend to try out different kinds of writing. I plan on posting the things I’m really proud of here, because getting feedback is another staple of writing.

Job Boards

Looking for a job in the 2o15 involves a lot of time on the internet. Yes, you should also be talking to people and trying to network and all that stuff, but good old fashioned applying is now done online. That means job boards. They are wonderful and terrible at the same time and I’ve taken it upon myself to review some of the most popular.

Monster

I have a feeling this site is great for employers but not as great for wannabe employees. The keywords they have are very specific so you can’t put in something like “writer” or “journalist” and have results. It may just be geared toward people in other professions, but for anyone creative it is not the place. Once I finally get choices, it’s all for the same organization, so there must be some sort of sponsorship happening. I think chugging a Monster energy drink would be more helpful than using this website.

Indeed

Indeed is my go to, I check it first every time I sit down to apply. It’s easy to search, you can put on tons of filters like “relevancy” or “date.” These make it easy to find new posts everyday. Most of the time the search is really accurate even when you’re vague, but every once in awhile it brings up completely random and unrelated jobs. This happens to me about once a week, and I don’t know if it’s just the algorithm freaking out or if the site is trying to tell me to give up on the careers I’ve chosen. Either way it makes for a strange time. Another thing to keep in mind is that because the site is so popular a lot of people use it, so that means more competition, which is good or bad depending on how confident in your skills you are.

Simply Hired

This is an odd one. It feels a little quieter than the other two. Probably because they don’t have ads all over the place like Monster (Bro, what are you trying to prove?). Another site that can bring up just wacky results. Today I entered “Writing in Portland” and it brought up a biologist in Boston. Of course I opened it, but quickly closed the tab when the number one qualification was a degree in biology, who’d have thought? Like Monster, you see a lot of the same company, which is always a bummer to me. Many of the posts lead to other job boards which is annoying. If I wanted to see what those sites had to offer I would go to those sites, but they have a cool logo.

Elance

I have many thoughts and emotions about Elance, and they are mostly negative. For those who don’t know, it focuses on freelance and short time writing gigs. Something that is perfect for someone who needs some extra cash. However, they make it so impossible to apply to anything that I give up once a week. You have to make a profile, and unless you check the correct boxes you can’t apply to the posts. So you go back and change your profile the way they want it and they deactivate your account for two weeks to make the changes. I’m not a technology genius but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t take two weeks to update a website. Of course all of this pain and suffering can be avoided if you pay $10/month for a premium account. Elance, if I’m looking for jobs that pay $25 for 2,000 words I can’t afford to give you money every month.

Not many people know that LinkedIn has job postings, but it does. It makes it really easy to apply because you can connect your profile directly to a job post and even mildly stalk the person who posted it. In my experience, these posts are usually for people with more experience than this entry-level gal. So far I haven’t found any I’m qualified for, but it’s a good one to check.

There are many more, some that are job or region specific, and I’ve just gone over the ones I’ve used. Put your favorites and why in the comments.

Going out

I don’t understand the appeal of “going out” on the weekends. It’s one of those things like eating an entire casserole dish of mac and cheese in one sitting. It starts out exciting, is fun during the middle and then begins to suck. You spend time putting on make up and doing your hair, or whatever the male equivalent of that is.

The party doesn’t start until 10 but you find yourself dozing off at 6 so you put on some music and try to get pumped up for a fun night with your friends or co workers. Then you get to the bar or party and things seem cool. You catch up with your friends, get a beer and get the lay of the land. So far people seem to be having a good time. There’s a few people you know and then others you don’t, but the idea of making new friends is fresh and exciting. You boldly walk up to a group of people and start talking. Of course your dazzling wit immediately charms everyone and they begin to fall in love with you just like everyone does. Then the night goes on and people around you begin to get more drunk and soon your obscure Quantum Leap references aren’t landing like they did an hour ago.

So you return to the friends you came with only to find one of them is having an ex boyfriend situation and is crying in the bathroom. Another two hours are gone helping her and it’s already time to go home. The lights go on and everyone starts to pair up like they’re salmon needing to spawn before their short lives are over. You have a boyfriend so you just collect your belongings and head home.

Of course when you get home you realize you haven’t eaten since 5 because your night usually ends at 11, so you make yourself a snack, which ends up taking another hour and before you know it, it’s way later than you were intending staying up, and you still have to take your makeup off and go to bed. It’s not like it was in college, when you knew most everyone at the local bar and didn’t have to stick only to small talk for four hours. You also find yourself getting tired much earlier than you did three years ago. So not only are you tired and hungry, you’re thinking about your mortality and how age is a real thing that’s coming to get you.

Maybe some day I’ll get the appeal of a night on the town, but for the time being I would rather have my friends over for pizza, beer and a board game or movie. That is my natural habitat. Now, I don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea. If you love going out and getting dressed up and meeting new people and going to new places, get on with your bad self. I will join you for the first hour or two and then make a sneaky escape back to my couch.

Taxes

The H & R Block commercials have started and that can only mean one thing, it’s tax season. Regardless of how you feel about taxes and how much you should be taxed, you gotta do them. That’s how they got Capone. It wasn’t the murder or moving alcohol through tunnels in the streets, it was tax evasion.

I know it can be scary to do taxes on your own for the first time, but it isn’t as bad as it seams. In fact, I don’t really mind doing my taxes, especially with services like Turbo Tax (state taxes are free this year, y’all! I’m not sponsored by Turbo Tax, but I wouldn’t say no.)

Now I say I don’t mind doing my taxes, but I have been audited once and narrowly avoided it again last year. It’s not that I’m careless or don’t understand how to file taxes, it’s that there are so many things to keep in mind. Do you go to school? (Yes.) Do you have health insurance? (Yes.) Can you claim any dependents? (I don’t think so.) Can anyone claim you as a dependent? (Wait, didn’t you just ask me that?) What was your favorite color when you were 9? (I don’t see why that matters.) How many times have you eaten rice in the last year? (Any specific kind of rice? I was eating a lot of white rice, but switched to brown.) Do you think Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter can work things out? (Probably, I don’t really know. Is this relevant?) Do you have opinions on the state of Yemen? (I mean, I guess so.)

Then, 2 hours later, you finally hit Submit and come out of a trance. The worst part comes next, the waiting. You’ve spent all this time, dredged up all the places you worked in the last year and entered your social security number into numerous boxes, and now you must wait for approval. Waiting for your taxes to be approved is like waiting to get into college. You know you’ve done all you can and you can’t change anything, but you can’t stop obsessing over whether or not you completed everything the right way.

It’s an intense process for sure, but it’s pretty cool to get some money. Technically it’s money you already paid to the government, but it’s still a nice mid-winter treat. So to all my 20-somethings out there, get your taxes done early. Don’t be like Capone, in any aspect of his life.

Resolutions

We are entering the third full week of January and I am just now thinking about resolutions. I’ve never been one for New Years resolutions. I would rather make weekly or monthly goals because I feel like cutting things into smaller bits makes them more manageable. Like cutting a steak, I like to cut down things that will improve me.

I can say, this year I’m going to work out and eat better, but unless I have specifics it won’t happen. For instance, starting today I’m going to work out for 30 minutes, five times this week, only eat out once a week and do my dishes before I go to sleep. These resolutions only apply for this week. If it works out, I will reinstate them for the week after. That’s the only way I’ll be successful because I know myself.

I love to bargain with myself. If I don’t work out on Monday I will tell myself that I will work out on Sunday, but I won’t. I know I won’t yet I let myself not work out. That’s why I set small, reachable goals for the day or week. I don’t have the self discipline to work on year-long goals.

I also am highly motivated by rewards. So if I don’t buy any food all week, I can get a pizza on Saturday. Or if I beat my mile time, I can buy a beer. I’m basically like a dog. If I know there will be a treat in my future, I am more likely to do a task. You could say, isn’t being healthy the reward or eating well? Yes, but that takes so long. I would rather have a pizza. It’s not rocket science, but it works.

Cheers to anyone who follows through with yearly resolutions, I salute you!

I’ll see you at the end of the week and we’ll see how well I did.

I’m why we can’t have nice things

My super hip boss has a mini motor bike he uses to get around the office. On Monday, some of the guys at the office asked if I had ever ridden it, and if I wanted to. I, in my infinite wisdom, said yes. Don’t get it wrong, there was no peer pressure involved, just a group of people who wanted me to feel included. So I hopped on and made it two feet before I smacked into the wall and fell over.

After my embarrassment wore off I realized my finger and knee were hurting pretty bad. During the next couple hours I watched my knee grow a nasty bruise as my finger swelled to three times its size. It stayed that way for a couple days and even now I’m typing this with one finger on my left hand. You might think this is a pretty extreme outcome to a casual ride on something made for children in an enclosed space.

Well let me take you back to the summer of 2011. I was back home from college and my friends Jordyn and Erin wanted to go to the roller rink for their birthdays. I used to roller skate a bit back in the day so I was down. As soon as I put on the skates I realized the last time I had wheels attached to my feet I was 5. This was made even more apparent as I started to go around and around to bad covers of Dave Matthews. I wasn’t terrible but I definitely wasn’t comfortable. Soon I sort of got the hang of it and found a rhythm as long as I didn’t slow down or stop.

Jordyn was a natural. She was spinning and going backwards, your basic Yamaguchi. I lost sight of Erin for five minutes, to be fair, I couldn’t take my eyes off the ground ahead of me. On a quick and daring glance up, I saw her sitting on the side of the rink. Worried something was wrong I made my way over to her. Of course I wasn’t able to slow down so I was planning on every so gracefully gliding into the wall.

Instead, I hit the bump where the hardwood turns into carpet and fell backwards. The next few minutes are a blur, but I’m told I put my arm back to catch myself, then started laughing at my fall. Erin tried to help me up but my arm stayed behind.

Jordyn was in nursing school so she went into full caretaker mode, asking me what hurt, if I could move, if I had hit my head. Though I felt fine, I couldn’t support my arm enough to stand up. The manager from the rink ran up and started asking me to sign things. Since I couldn’t feel my dominant hand I said, “I’m not going to sue,” over and over while another worker made me a splint out of newspaper and skate laces.

I was finally able to stand up and with skates still on, Jordyn wheeled me out as Erin carried my shoes. I was finally able to get into the car and Erin began to drive. Every turn and bump were excruciating but I didn’t start crying until I realized I couldn’t go into work at a restaurant that night.

After half an hour of waiting in the ER, the doctor told me I had dislocated my elbow and I wouldn’t be able to work for 6 weeks. He then gave me some pain meds and popped my elbow back in as I named every bone in the body.

I would like to reiterate both of these activities, roller skating and mini moto bikes, are meant for children, and I managed to spectacularly mess both of them up. I’m not even going to go into the time I dislocated my knee cap falling down three stairs. I assure you, the stairs are not steep or slippery, I’m just uncoordinated. I will find a way to hurt myself doing the most mundane tasks. What made me think I could do something cool?

I’m the reason we can’t have nice things.

December is a rough month

While I normally love December because of the fact that somehow there’s chocolate everywhere and people try to be nicer to others, it is a terrible time for job applications. Employers focus on their families and friends and crap like that and they don’t post or respond to job openings. I’ve been looking at the same four posts since November 21st.

Strangely there are a ton of posts for unpaid internships, maybe they think we’re desperate in the cold winter months, and they might be right. I saw a post for two hours a week, for a month. Yeah, that seems worth it.

Anyway, the point is that this dark, gloomy month isn’t conducive for ending unemployment. There is good news, January is right around the corner. In January employers are excited for a fresh start and begin looking for new faces to join their team. So I’m going to think of December as a bit of a break. I’m still going to look at the normal sites to see if anything has changed, but I’m not going to worry about it as much.

Enjoy the lights, time with family and the free food at all the parties you’re going to attend. Also if you celebrate holidays were gifts are called for, maybe spend some time online shopping. Stores are far too busy and stressful this time of year. I’m getting off track.

Someone Call A Grownup

Tales of a graduate nothing

Category: Growing Up